tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post2535720554538342738..comments2023-04-05T04:26:56.712-05:00Comments on What Really Matters: There's No Right Way (In Their Eyes)Set Freehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02297157352927686694noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-81514073204221407712009-04-20T19:38:00.000-05:002009-04-20T19:38:00.000-05:00Just want you all to know you are not alone. I le...Just want you all to know you are not alone. I left a controlling a church after being raised in there for 26 years. I worked, sacrificed, helped out and did everything I could. As far as paying tithes, it is in God's word to do that so I look to Him when it comes to that aspect for everything I need. My church was so controlling that the people who are still there want to leave but are scared they will hurt the pastor's feelings. The problem is that the pastor and his wife both have control issues. They love to use people and get people to do things for them. They never let anyone know who they have doing things for them and to what degree. That way when they dropped you, if you had any complaints or issues, it would be easier for them to deny. Unfortunately, the people who have no discernment can't see pass the air they breathe which makes you look as though you have the problem. I agree with the one who said that you really do feel free once you leave. Truth be told, the people that remain are more than likely jealous because they don't have the strength or sense to make the same move.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-54945607381811046782009-02-06T16:50:00.000-06:002009-02-06T16:50:00.000-06:00I have decided to leave my church and I think I've...I have decided to leave my church and I think I've finally realized that what you have said here is true. I kept looking for the "right way" to leave, but after listening to some that have left and their experiences I think I will just slip out quietly. I just can't stay any longer and listen to the nonense coming forth.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-44323486194558508932009-01-21T16:41:00.000-06:002009-01-21T16:41:00.000-06:00Where are you? I need a post!Where are you? I need a post!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-66325910561635332182009-01-03T10:24:00.000-06:002009-01-03T10:24:00.000-06:00Cassie,I think you are absolutely right. I think i...Cassie,<BR/>I think you are absolutely right. I think it's hard when you wake up and realize that you were only used instead of geniunely loved and appreciated. I've even heard pastors use the phrase "God is promoting you" when they are finished using you. They try to put it off on God instead of just being truthful.Set Freehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02297157352927686694noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-41960599183677181422009-01-02T23:11:00.000-06:002009-01-02T23:11:00.000-06:00They use you and use you to make themselves look g...They use you and use you to make themselves look good. They don't care about you at all. But then they make it sound like God is on their side when they dog you and talk ugly about you. I think that's one reason some people have such a hard time getting over this type of thing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-25117234458761469692009-01-01T15:18:00.000-06:002009-01-01T15:18:00.000-06:00If we were dealing with honest people, there could...If we were dealing with honest people, there could be a polite way to leave a controlling church. But there's not. <BR/><BR/>Speaking of Al Capone: In the church I left the controlling pastor once said he loved the Godfather movies. He said it after a visiting minister had been in who had once had mob ties. This pastor said it dressed in mob fashion, back suit, white tie. <BR/><BR/>It said more about him than he realized at the time. -CHAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-20994238324029995852008-12-30T10:26:00.000-06:002008-12-30T10:26:00.000-06:00Setfree,I would like to add this to what you said:...Setfree,<BR/><BR/>I would like to add this to what you said: It's not only the way you leave that isn't good enough for the pastor. It's also, just about anything you might do at the church while you are there. No matter if it’s your work at the church or how you conduct your life, it is never good enough for him. Sure, you might get a pat on the back every once in a while, but most of the time he's never satisfied, i.e., eye-rolling, sighing, embarrassing you in front of others, or chewing you out. So, why did any of us think it would be any different when we left "his majesty"? <BR/> <BR/>His lack of dissatisfaction and disgust are a way of controlling people. That's just one way he keeps his staff and church people running around like chickens with their heads cut off, working like mad to please him. <BR/><BR/>Can I get an "Amen"?<BR/><BR/>-Amos M.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7650900400282023195.post-53863886175378640522008-12-30T00:31:00.000-06:002008-12-30T00:31:00.000-06:00To anyone who is in a controlling church they shou...To anyone who is in a controlling church they should get out as soon as possible. The "loving leaders" will turn on them so quick it will make their head spin. No matter how much they have given in money or time and no matter what sacrifices they have made for that church or the leaders once it is discovered that they are not brainwashed anymore they become obselete and an object to be smeared.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com